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Dirtbag, Massachusetts: A Confessional
Isaac Fitzgerald has lived many lives. He's been an altar boy, a bartender, a fat kid, a smuggler, a biker, a prince of New England. But before all that, he was a bomb that exploded his parents' lives-or so he was told. In Dirtbag, Massachusetts, Fitzgerald, with warmth and humor, recounts his ongoing search for forgiveness, a more far-reaching vision of masculinity, and a more expansive definition of family and self.
Fitzgerald's memoir-in-essays begins with a childhood that moves at breakneck speed from safety to violence, recounting an extraordinary pilgrimage through trauma to self-understanding and, ultimately, acceptance. From growing up in a Boston homeless shelter to bartending in San Francisco, from smuggling medical supplies into Burma to his lifelong struggle to make peace with his body, Fitzgerald strives to take control of his own story: one that aims to put aside anger, isolation, and entitlement to embrace the idea that one can be generous to oneself by being generous to others.
Gritty and clear-eyed, loud-hearted and beautiful, Dirtbag, Massachusetts is a rollicking book that might also be a lifeline.
Fitzgerald's memoir-in-essays begins with a childhood that moves at breakneck speed from safety to violence, recounting an extraordinary pilgrimage through trauma to self-understanding and, ultimately, acceptance. From growing up in a Boston homeless shelter to bartending in San Francisco, from smuggling medical supplies into Burma to his lifelong struggle to make peace with his body, Fitzgerald strives to take control of his own story: one that aims to put aside anger, isolation, and entitlement to embrace the idea that one can be generous to oneself by being generous to others.
Gritty and clear-eyed, loud-hearted and beautiful, Dirtbag, Massachusetts is a rollicking book that might also be a lifeline.
256 pages, Hardcover
First published July 19, 2022
About the author
Isaac Fitzgerald
10 books288 followersIsaac Fitzgerald appears frequently on The Today Show and is the author of the bestselling children’s book How to Be a Pirate as well as the co-author of Pen & Ink: Tattoos and the Stories Behind Them and Knives & Ink: Chefs and the Stories Behind Their Tattoos (winner of an IACP Award). His writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Guardian, The Best American Nonrequired Reading, The Boston Globe and numerous other publications. His debut memoir, Dirtbag, Massachusetts, is forthcoming in July, 2022. He lives in Brooklyn.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 796 reviews
March 23, 2022
This book, this beautiful, sprawling, chaotic memoir in essays, is indeed a confessional. It is a man peeling back the layers of himself, revealing the white of his bones, the depth of his soul, the truth of his flaws, and the power of the best parts of him, of which there are so many. Isaac Fitzgerald will make you feel absolutely everything as he recounts a childhood no one should have to endure, and how he has tried to rebuild the parts of himself that other people broke. He is charming and vulnerable, curious and candid, full of dirtbag swagger. I loved this book. When I turned the last page, I wanted more but was so grateful to have spent this time with a man who is on the complicated but joyful journey of becoming and being himself.
July 20, 2022
Yipe! Beware of hype!
Damn blurb-land! Oh, sure, the blurb is just overflowing with compliments; “best of” all over the place. (And the accolades are even in boldface, just to make sure you see them all bright, that you see how important they are.) Throw in a few gushy, trusty reviews, and this drooling, itchy book addict didn’t stand a chance of saying No to the Book!
I’m not saying this memoir is bad—not at all. I’m just saying it’s Mediocre-ville. I honestly don’t get the hype. This is basically a plain memoir about a guy who drinks too much and whose greatest joy is a bar in California. Most of the first half of the book is about his bar worship (he even got to work there after many years as a customer, which was a huge delight to him). His ode to a bar got old, and I was sick of hanging around in that dive.
This is a memoir, so I’m not going to complain about what the writer does with his life. My complaints have to do with what he chose to emphasize (the bar) and whether he’s a good storyteller (he passes that test with flying colors). Besides the bar, the first half of the book is about incidents with his Catholic church; these were interesting but didn’t affect me. I think anyone who was raised Catholic would relate to and appreciate those chapters more than I did. I did find it interesting that he thought that the church beat politeness into him. I’ve heard friends say the same thing.
The second half of the book was way more interesting. He got out of the bar and into some fascinating experiences. Fitzgerald is a great writer, so the scenes he describes are vivid and affecting. Two of his adventures are especially bizarro, and I couldn’t take my eyes off the page when he was describing them. He spent time in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I had visited that city for a couple of weeks, so it was fun to hear about his life there.
Scattered throughout the book are self-reflections. I liked those, but there weren’t enough. Also, it was strange that I didn’t learn until late in the book that he didn’t like himself. Somehow that fact didn’t manage to come through at first. I guess I didn’t do a good job of reading between the lines. I had felt he was bragging about his screw-ups, when it turns out he was complaining about them and was no doubt embarrassed.
Also, he chose to tell about his sad, messed-up childhood at the end of the book instead of at the beginning, which I found an odd decision. I think I would have felt more sympathetic if I had known from the start what made him who he is today, but that’s just my preference.
At the very end, he gets a little lecture-y, talking about politics. Although I share his political views, I don’t think they belong in a memoir.
Oh, and I forgot to mention: I loved the Cross Your Fingers book cover (and the same Cross Your Fingers drawing appears at the start of each chapter, which was cool), and the title is really strange and enticing.
Overall—balancing the boring with the interesting—an okay read. I just wish the book hadn’t been hyped so much, so my expectations wouldn’t have been so high.
Thanks to NetGalley and Edelweiss for the advance copy.
Damn blurb-land! Oh, sure, the blurb is just overflowing with compliments; “best of” all over the place. (And the accolades are even in boldface, just to make sure you see them all bright, that you see how important they are.) Throw in a few gushy, trusty reviews, and this drooling, itchy book addict didn’t stand a chance of saying No to the Book!
I’m not saying this memoir is bad—not at all. I’m just saying it’s Mediocre-ville. I honestly don’t get the hype. This is basically a plain memoir about a guy who drinks too much and whose greatest joy is a bar in California. Most of the first half of the book is about his bar worship (he even got to work there after many years as a customer, which was a huge delight to him). His ode to a bar got old, and I was sick of hanging around in that dive.
This is a memoir, so I’m not going to complain about what the writer does with his life. My complaints have to do with what he chose to emphasize (the bar) and whether he’s a good storyteller (he passes that test with flying colors). Besides the bar, the first half of the book is about incidents with his Catholic church; these were interesting but didn’t affect me. I think anyone who was raised Catholic would relate to and appreciate those chapters more than I did. I did find it interesting that he thought that the church beat politeness into him. I’ve heard friends say the same thing.
The second half of the book was way more interesting. He got out of the bar and into some fascinating experiences. Fitzgerald is a great writer, so the scenes he describes are vivid and affecting. Two of his adventures are especially bizarro, and I couldn’t take my eyes off the page when he was describing them. He spent time in Chiang Mai, Thailand. I had visited that city for a couple of weeks, so it was fun to hear about his life there.
Scattered throughout the book are self-reflections. I liked those, but there weren’t enough. Also, it was strange that I didn’t learn until late in the book that he didn’t like himself. Somehow that fact didn’t manage to come through at first. I guess I didn’t do a good job of reading between the lines. I had felt he was bragging about his screw-ups, when it turns out he was complaining about them and was no doubt embarrassed.
Also, he chose to tell about his sad, messed-up childhood at the end of the book instead of at the beginning, which I found an odd decision. I think I would have felt more sympathetic if I had known from the start what made him who he is today, but that’s just my preference.
At the very end, he gets a little lecture-y, talking about politics. Although I share his political views, I don’t think they belong in a memoir.
Oh, and I forgot to mention: I loved the Cross Your Fingers book cover (and the same Cross Your Fingers drawing appears at the start of each chapter, which was cool), and the title is really strange and enticing.
Overall—balancing the boring with the interesting—an okay read. I just wish the book hadn’t been hyped so much, so my expectations wouldn’t have been so high.
Thanks to NetGalley and Edelweiss for the advance copy.
July 13, 2022
There was nothing to do in these old mill towns but fuck, get fucked up, or fuck somebody else up. We spent our days doing drugs, driving around in trucks, drinking beer, and listening to music, Some of us had more money than others, but nobody had much of it. We were poor kids in a poor area of a rich state.
Fitzgerald examines his past in this series of essays that form a memoir. He's not had an easy life, but it's one worth reading about . . . if you've got the stomach for it. Though there are laugh-out-loud moments, the tales can be rough, and difficult to read. The author has had a hard-living, hard-drinking existence. He likes bars, tattoos, and porn.
Here's our author at age fourteen:
I sat, and a big bald man with a Viking goatee cried out, "Get the kid a Three Wise Men!" Plunked down in front of me was a single huge shot glass, which had three regular-sized shots poured into it: Jack, Jim, and Johnnie. I drank it like the kid I still sort of was, not knowing yet how to slam the liquor into the back of my throat. Instead, I tasted every drop as it rolled over my tongue, doing everything in my power to keep myself from wincing as the booze hit each new taste bud. The men cheered. There it was, the burn of a shot improperly taken mixing with the instant camaraderie of drinking.
Much of this is about self-determination, and rising above the circumstances of one's birth. That Fitzgerald can write about his past with such grace, and occasional humor is commendable. I can't wait to see what he comes up with next.
Fitzgerald examines his past in this series of essays that form a memoir. He's not had an easy life, but it's one worth reading about . . . if you've got the stomach for it. Though there are laugh-out-loud moments, the tales can be rough, and difficult to read. The author has had a hard-living, hard-drinking existence. He likes bars, tattoos, and porn.
Here's our author at age fourteen:
I sat, and a big bald man with a Viking goatee cried out, "Get the kid a Three Wise Men!" Plunked down in front of me was a single huge shot glass, which had three regular-sized shots poured into it: Jack, Jim, and Johnnie. I drank it like the kid I still sort of was, not knowing yet how to slam the liquor into the back of my throat. Instead, I tasted every drop as it rolled over my tongue, doing everything in my power to keep myself from wincing as the booze hit each new taste bud. The men cheered. There it was, the burn of a shot improperly taken mixing with the instant camaraderie of drinking.
Much of this is about self-determination, and rising above the circumstances of one's birth. That Fitzgerald can write about his past with such grace, and occasional humor is commendable. I can't wait to see what he comes up with next.
August 25, 2022
Fitzgerald is beloved by all the Brooklyn writers you know and love, but I am not sure I know why. I mean he seems like a sweet, if wildly self-involved guy, but I don't get the point of this memoir. A good memoir tells us something about the person writing it, the people who impact the memoirist's life and who feel the impact of the memoirist's choices, and also it points to other more universal truths. Using that calculus:
I learned something about Isaac Fitzgerald. I learned that he does not judge others, at least in part because he does not want others to judge him. I learned he judges himself plenty, and often unfairly, but he judges himself for things that are not real problems so he does not have to address the things about himself that matter. I learned he is a drunk. I learned he is kind. I learned he stunningly irresponsible but charming enough that others save him from enduring the consequences of his (in)actions.
Fitzgerald implies that his terrible childhood is to blame for many things, and he hints at his parents' bad behavior. Allowing the reader to know more about his parents and their behavior would therefore have added a lot of value. I cannot figure out why Fitzgerald chose not the tell us anything about tragic mental and physical abuse his parents inflicted on him until the last chapter. Mostly they just seemed like immature seeker types until then. He waits for the penultimate chapter to let us know about his siblings who are also an important part of understanding him and his choices. Without that context this was not a memoir, it was just a series of essays about chapters in Fitzgerald's life with nothing to bring them together.
So that covers getting to know Fitzgerald, and the people who impact him and who are impacted by him, what about the universality. I missed that. I did really love the essay about his time in the kink community in San Francisco, but it did not really mesh with the rest of the book and it did not feel like memoir -- it was about the much more interesting Peter Acworth, Lorelai Lee and Princess Donna, not who they were with him or to him, but just about them. I also felt the chapter about asshole Gavin McInnes was interesting, and also not memoir or confessional but rather cultural commentary even though he tried to link it with his trips to the barber.
If I am going to read about irresponsible drunks who let other people pay their bills give me Bukowski. He at least is funny and insightful and writes like no one else. This was a complete waste of time other than the sections that were not memoir at all - those essays were good enough to get this to the 2-star. .
I learned something about Isaac Fitzgerald. I learned that he does not judge others, at least in part because he does not want others to judge him. I learned he judges himself plenty, and often unfairly, but he judges himself for things that are not real problems so he does not have to address the things about himself that matter. I learned he is a drunk. I learned he is kind. I learned he stunningly irresponsible but charming enough that others save him from enduring the consequences of his (in)actions.
Fitzgerald implies that his terrible childhood is to blame for many things, and he hints at his parents' bad behavior. Allowing the reader to know more about his parents and their behavior would therefore have added a lot of value. I cannot figure out why Fitzgerald chose not the tell us anything about tragic mental and physical abuse his parents inflicted on him until the last chapter. Mostly they just seemed like immature seeker types until then. He waits for the penultimate chapter to let us know about his siblings who are also an important part of understanding him and his choices. Without that context this was not a memoir, it was just a series of essays about chapters in Fitzgerald's life with nothing to bring them together.
So that covers getting to know Fitzgerald, and the people who impact him and who are impacted by him, what about the universality. I missed that. I did really love the essay about his time in the kink community in San Francisco, but it did not really mesh with the rest of the book and it did not feel like memoir -- it was about the much more interesting Peter Acworth, Lorelai Lee and Princess Donna, not who they were with him or to him, but just about them. I also felt the chapter about asshole Gavin McInnes was interesting, and also not memoir or confessional but rather cultural commentary even though he tried to link it with his trips to the barber.
If I am going to read about irresponsible drunks who let other people pay their bills give me Bukowski. He at least is funny and insightful and writes like no one else. This was a complete waste of time other than the sections that were not memoir at all - those essays were good enough to get this to the 2-star. .
September 25, 2022
In 12 interconnected essays, Fitzgerald tells a story about masculinity in postmodern America - his story. Born a Catholic to parents who were both married to other people, the author peels back layer after layer of his life by centering on different aspects of his identity in every chapter: From body image issues to male teenage violence, from becoming a sex-positive porn actor to working at a biker bar, from mental and physical abuse to intergenerational trauma, from the search for meaning as an American in a foreign country to right-wing male role models, from drinking to driving to messy relationships. It's captivating how Fitzgerald relates to writers like Jack Kerouac and Charles Bukowski, but without embracing their toxic traits; and I also greatly enjoyed his passionate defense of the ability to grow: Staying true to yourself doesn't mean staying the same, and it also doesn't mean covering up your mistakes.
This reads like a very honest text that reflects male behaviors not by looking at others and pointing out how they display toxic masculinity; Fitzgerald is much braver: He ponders his masculinity, where he went wrong, how he made things right, and where he is still struggling. The text breathes secondary orality, it's as if Fitzgerald is conveying the story at night, at a bar, over a beer, in a laconic, but also serious tone. I listened to the audio book, and it's great fun while also being insightful - an important feat in a time in which a tendency arises that seems to maintain that gender equality needs not moral, but moralistic texts.
Great stuff.
This reads like a very honest text that reflects male behaviors not by looking at others and pointing out how they display toxic masculinity; Fitzgerald is much braver: He ponders his masculinity, where he went wrong, how he made things right, and where he is still struggling. The text breathes secondary orality, it's as if Fitzgerald is conveying the story at night, at a bar, over a beer, in a laconic, but also serious tone. I listened to the audio book, and it's great fun while also being insightful - an important feat in a time in which a tendency arises that seems to maintain that gender equality needs not moral, but moralistic texts.
Great stuff.
August 28, 2022
I’m not sure I care a lot about white masculinity in this way at this time. The writing is very good but none of the essays really could hold my attention or imagination. I liked the author and he’s a very good writer, but again, there was just nothing for me to sink my teeth into. It felt like he said all the right things and didn’t really offer up anything new to the conversations.
September 23, 2022
I was pissed off for a large portion of this book. Why did this guy get a book deal? Why was this recommended by writers I respect? Why does the cover call it a "revelation?" This is a very basic, straight white dude who reminds you at every turn that he has tattoos and likes to drink and go to cool bars. He likes Fight Club and the Hold Steady. He likes porn. His parents were shitty and poor. Like literally every other dude you've ever met.
There is nothing revelatory about this book. There is no unique point of view. A lot of it feels braggy, like look at how cool I am I have all these friends and tattoos and bar stories, while also making sure he comes off as self-aware of his cis-white-maleness and to be appropriately self-deprecating to make up for it. The final chapter makes me feel some amount of empathy towards him, but it was too late, as I was already super annoyed at choosing to read this book, whose writing was mediocre at best.
I didn't like this book and I don't particularly like this guy now. He's like the ex-boyfriend that a lot of us have. Ask me how I really feel.
There is nothing revelatory about this book. There is no unique point of view. A lot of it feels braggy, like look at how cool I am I have all these friends and tattoos and bar stories, while also making sure he comes off as self-aware of his cis-white-maleness and to be appropriately self-deprecating to make up for it. The final chapter makes me feel some amount of empathy towards him, but it was too late, as I was already super annoyed at choosing to read this book, whose writing was mediocre at best.
I didn't like this book and I don't particularly like this guy now. He's like the ex-boyfriend that a lot of us have. Ask me how I really feel.
August 11, 2022
This feels somewhere between self congratulatory and self-obliterating, a braggart who romanticizes the past that he has created and vilifies the past that his parents created. I'm glad for his own sake that he was able to create this book as part of his therapy but I really didn't find it compelling enough to be shared with the rest of the world.
September 17, 2022
This morning when I went to pick up my Sunday Boston Globe from the driveway, it unceremoniously dropped out of the other side scattering every which way. Both sides of the protective plastic bag were open. I immediately lost all composure. This was not the fist time this agonizing experience has happened. Why would my newspaper deliverer keep doing this? It was not as if they could see me crawling around in my plaid nightshirt agitatedly gathering up all the sections while giggling diabolically. What kind of sadistic sociopath was she? The answer may be found in Isaac Fitzgerald’s new memoir, Dirtbag Massachusetts. Subtitled, “a confessional”, Fitzgerald’s book details the ways seemingly normal folks can spiral downward and make horrible choices such as gleefully wrapping the September 11, 2022, edition of the Globe in a bag that will spill out either side causing me to shriek obscenities all down my block (scattering young children, senior citizens, and squirrels) on the Lord’s Day of rest. In Fitzgerald’s case it began a s a young child experiencing the physical and emotional abuse of his parents (not to mention living in poverty and obesity). The ringer we can put our children through, right? Fitzgerald soon begins abusing alcohol and narcotics. He acts out in violent ways. This is a memoir, so we know there will be many sad and trying events and boy do they start adding up. The tragic path he is on is as apparent as the spleen in Slim Goodbody. He continues to overindulge in alcohol, similar to Mr. Bunny’s addiction to carrots, And the rough times rain down like a load of ping pong balls bouncing on your head. What turns Fitzgerald around are the many people who care and look out for him. These include administrators in his school that hook him up with a scholarship to a private boarding school, getting him away from his unhealthy home life. Then there are his friends and coworkers (mostly people living on the fringe of society and struggling themselves). He eventually starts helping to smuggle in medical supplies to displaced refugees in Burma. In a complete 360,he now appears frequently on the Today Show sipping fancy Kombucha drinks with Carson Daily and creating elaborate fist bumping/high five routines with Savannah Guthrie. Fitzgerald’s writing is never over the top like those garish trousers worn by Mr. Green Jeans, and the subtle nature of his writing, packs a surprisingly powerful impact, reminiscent of the subtle force of Bob Keeshan’s acting. Now I do not have enough information to positively say that the person delivering my Sunday newspaper in a bag with both sides opened has been abused or suffered a rough upbringing, but not having enough information has never stopped me before, so I feel this is more than likely the case. In that regard I will forgive them and recommend Dirtbag Massachusetts if you are looking for a well written, if oftentimes sad memoir.
May 22, 2022
I had never heard of this author before reading this book, but the title intrigued me, having myself grown up in a part of Massachusetts that was past its heyday. This memoir is told in a series of essays discussing a variety of topics. Usually in an essay collection, I find myself enjoying a handful of the essays with the rest being forgettable.
However, in this collection, I enjoyed almost every chapter. The author examines subjects such as family, religion, violence, volunteerism abroad, sexual consent, and more. The common thread that I found throughout the book is a sense of hope. The author is able to reflect and grow from his experiences, however difficult they may be.
The author writes in a relatable and easy to read style. I would recommend this book to any readers who enjoy memoirs.
However, in this collection, I enjoyed almost every chapter. The author examines subjects such as family, religion, violence, volunteerism abroad, sexual consent, and more. The common thread that I found throughout the book is a sense of hope. The author is able to reflect and grow from his experiences, however difficult they may be.
The author writes in a relatable and easy to read style. I would recommend this book to any readers who enjoy memoirs.
August 7, 2022
I am kind of unsure about this book and how exactly I feel about it, probably because I have a lot of mixed feelings. There are parts I liked. He writes well, is quite descriptive, and does get quite vulnerable. Some of the stories were really interesting and captivating to the point I couldn't stop. The last chapter/"essay" was what I was hoping most of the book would be. A chronological walk through of his life.
But to what made me not like the book. First, I think part of it is I had 0 attachment to or knowledge of this guy prior to this book. So, he didn't hold any special place in my heart prior to coming to this book. Perhaps someone who has followed him and his life before will love this book so much more. But because he's a complete stranger, my experience of reading the book is just that: me reading about some random dude's story as he grew up in New England. That isn't bad in-itself. It just is. But maybe because of my 0 attachment, my reading is colored.
Second, I think I don't really like the guy. I honestly think that's what's it. I do feel for him and empathize with him and what he's gone through in life. But he comes off as kind of an asshole. Of course, maybe that's just the "I don't give a f*** about what people think about me" New England type attitude. But I just found myself kind of put off, and I can't point to any specific thing he did or said once or twice. I think it's just the persona or vibe he gives off. He's just not my type of dude. He's an alcoholic and drowned away his problems. He recognizes that's what he's done but he just kind of shrugs it off. I guess I was hoping there'd be some redemption or even some repentance or humility in the book. Maybe there was some of it in the book. But it didn't feel like it. But then maybe that's a me problem. He doesn't owe me that. This is his story.
But, yeah, he's an alcoholic. Has worked at and loves bars. Bars are basically his home and life. That just isn't my vibe. He admits that that's how he came to find safety from the chaos at home. But bars and the bar scene just do not do that for me. He also had a stint in pornography which I did NOT like reading about, though I did read on because of curiosity. He doesn't want kids; he abandoned catholicism and doesn't believe in God. And I can go on. Basically, we have very different values and perspectives on life. I did appreciate his vulnerability and just getting a picture of another's life and how he works to overcome his past. But there wasn't much of an offer of hope or redemption. Again, that's a me problem as that's an expectation I had of his work that he never said he was going to give us.
So, I came away thinking yeah, there are some good points, but I can't get myself to like the guy. He's not the kind of guy I'd want to be friends with. I thought some of his political meandering were just kind of whiney. They lacked substance and I didn't really care for that or like it much. This book got a lot of hype, and I do not think this matches the hype at all. I agree with other 2 star reviewers that basically called this mediocre. Just a really mediocre memoir from someone I have 0 investment in. I am glad I at least stepped out of my comfort zone to get a different experience. I'm just bummed it left a not-so-good taste in my mouth.
But to what made me not like the book. First, I think part of it is I had 0 attachment to or knowledge of this guy prior to this book. So, he didn't hold any special place in my heart prior to coming to this book. Perhaps someone who has followed him and his life before will love this book so much more. But because he's a complete stranger, my experience of reading the book is just that: me reading about some random dude's story as he grew up in New England. That isn't bad in-itself. It just is. But maybe because of my 0 attachment, my reading is colored.
Second, I think I don't really like the guy. I honestly think that's what's it. I do feel for him and empathize with him and what he's gone through in life. But he comes off as kind of an asshole. Of course, maybe that's just the "I don't give a f*** about what people think about me" New England type attitude. But I just found myself kind of put off, and I can't point to any specific thing he did or said once or twice. I think it's just the persona or vibe he gives off. He's just not my type of dude. He's an alcoholic and drowned away his problems. He recognizes that's what he's done but he just kind of shrugs it off. I guess I was hoping there'd be some redemption or even some repentance or humility in the book. Maybe there was some of it in the book. But it didn't feel like it. But then maybe that's a me problem. He doesn't owe me that. This is his story.
But, yeah, he's an alcoholic. Has worked at and loves bars. Bars are basically his home and life. That just isn't my vibe. He admits that that's how he came to find safety from the chaos at home. But bars and the bar scene just do not do that for me. He also had a stint in pornography which I did NOT like reading about, though I did read on because of curiosity. He doesn't want kids; he abandoned catholicism and doesn't believe in God. And I can go on. Basically, we have very different values and perspectives on life. I did appreciate his vulnerability and just getting a picture of another's life and how he works to overcome his past. But there wasn't much of an offer of hope or redemption. Again, that's a me problem as that's an expectation I had of his work that he never said he was going to give us.
So, I came away thinking yeah, there are some good points, but I can't get myself to like the guy. He's not the kind of guy I'd want to be friends with. I thought some of his political meandering were just kind of whiney. They lacked substance and I didn't really care for that or like it much. This book got a lot of hype, and I do not think this matches the hype at all. I agree with other 2 star reviewers that basically called this mediocre. Just a really mediocre memoir from someone I have 0 investment in. I am glad I at least stepped out of my comfort zone to get a different experience. I'm just bummed it left a not-so-good taste in my mouth.
August 13, 2022
Despite the catchy title, the majority of this book does not take place in Massachusetts, but in San Francisco, Brooklyn, and Burma of all places. I felt it was not a cohesive story, but a collection of essays and, in fact, the author calls them essays himself. Having to listen to the author drone on at length about his favorite bars, bands, and barbershops distracted from the story I think he was trying to tell. Also listening to him whine about not being able to make rent because he spent all his money practically living in bars, buying drinks and leaving "generous" tips, was both confusing and annoying. In an odd twist, the author didn't tell the really bad stuff about what his parents did to him as a child until the end of the book so I never developed much empathy for him while listening to his essays as I just didn't understand until the end and then I was too annoyed to care.
September 5, 2022
3.5 stars, rounded upward.
I enjoy a good memoir, and so I was all in when I saw this singular work; my thanks go to Bloomsbury and Net Galley for the review copy. It’s by “the beloved founding editor of Buzzfeed Books,” but somehow, I either missed that part or forgot about it, so I read it and assessed it as if he were just some random guy, and ultimately, that’s probably the fairest way to do so anyway. This book is for sale now.
Fitzgerald has seen and done just about everything. His family life growing up is dreadful, and he is delighted to bail out of the screaming, wretched mess called home in order to attend boarding school. He is the scholarship kid, but he benefits plenty from the largesse of his classmates. Post education, he takes himself to San Francisco, with an entire continent stretching between himself and his family. Upon arrival, he continues his favorite pastime, drinking, which he began doing with his older brother when he was just twelve. His parents didn’t do it, so he figured it might be a good choice.
The promotional blurb says that this is the story of the author’s “search for a more expansive vision of masculinity.” Perhaps this is why I find it so hard to relate to. There are moments, though. A huge chunk of the first half in particular describes his affinity for bars, which he identifies as his safe spaces. My notes from the start of this segment say “Oh boy, I always wanted to read yet another alcoholic memoir.” Soon afterward, though, he says, as if reading my mind, that if we expect him to discuss the way he quit drinking, we’ll be in for a long wait, because he still drinks, though not nearly as much. That much was good for a chuckle. Then there’s another segment about his period with the porn industry. I confess I straight-up skimmed some of that, although again, there’s a moment, when he talks about the importance of consent, and how the porn industry, in his experience, is more careful and respectful of this boundary than anyone else he’s encountered.
The book is billed as being humorous, but this is a massive overstatement. Most of the content is dead serious. But then again—yes, you guessed it. There are moments.
What takes me by surprise, and happily so, is the message that he’s spent the whole book building toward, and I never see it coming until we’re there. I highlighted it in case I wanted to use it as a quote here, but that would be an epic spoiler. You didn’t know that memoirs can have spoilers? Oh yes. They can. And when I see this one, my disgruntlement fades and I am once again a perfectly gruntled reader and reviewer.
One aspect that I appreciate, and particularly appreciated during the rougher patches, is that the brief essays that, strung together, make up the memoir, make very short chapters, and they’re clearly marked. This is a terrific bedtime book, because I am able to find a reasonable stopping place when I need to turn out the light (or, as it happens, turn off my Kindle.)
If you’ve read this review and are interested, then I recommend it to you. I anticipate that men will enjoy it more than women.
I enjoy a good memoir, and so I was all in when I saw this singular work; my thanks go to Bloomsbury and Net Galley for the review copy. It’s by “the beloved founding editor of Buzzfeed Books,” but somehow, I either missed that part or forgot about it, so I read it and assessed it as if he were just some random guy, and ultimately, that’s probably the fairest way to do so anyway. This book is for sale now.
Fitzgerald has seen and done just about everything. His family life growing up is dreadful, and he is delighted to bail out of the screaming, wretched mess called home in order to attend boarding school. He is the scholarship kid, but he benefits plenty from the largesse of his classmates. Post education, he takes himself to San Francisco, with an entire continent stretching between himself and his family. Upon arrival, he continues his favorite pastime, drinking, which he began doing with his older brother when he was just twelve. His parents didn’t do it, so he figured it might be a good choice.
The promotional blurb says that this is the story of the author’s “search for a more expansive vision of masculinity.” Perhaps this is why I find it so hard to relate to. There are moments, though. A huge chunk of the first half in particular describes his affinity for bars, which he identifies as his safe spaces. My notes from the start of this segment say “Oh boy, I always wanted to read yet another alcoholic memoir.” Soon afterward, though, he says, as if reading my mind, that if we expect him to discuss the way he quit drinking, we’ll be in for a long wait, because he still drinks, though not nearly as much. That much was good for a chuckle. Then there’s another segment about his period with the porn industry. I confess I straight-up skimmed some of that, although again, there’s a moment, when he talks about the importance of consent, and how the porn industry, in his experience, is more careful and respectful of this boundary than anyone else he’s encountered.
The book is billed as being humorous, but this is a massive overstatement. Most of the content is dead serious. But then again—yes, you guessed it. There are moments.
What takes me by surprise, and happily so, is the message that he’s spent the whole book building toward, and I never see it coming until we’re there. I highlighted it in case I wanted to use it as a quote here, but that would be an epic spoiler. You didn’t know that memoirs can have spoilers? Oh yes. They can. And when I see this one, my disgruntlement fades and I am once again a perfectly gruntled reader and reviewer.
One aspect that I appreciate, and particularly appreciated during the rougher patches, is that the brief essays that, strung together, make up the memoir, make very short chapters, and they’re clearly marked. This is a terrific bedtime book, because I am able to find a reasonable stopping place when I need to turn out the light (or, as it happens, turn off my Kindle.)
If you’ve read this review and are interested, then I recommend it to you. I anticipate that men will enjoy it more than women.
October 14, 2022
"Some days you are happy to be alive, and you know you'll never forget the feeling or lose the knack. And other days you do forget; you do lose it. Nothing happens in order, and you have to do it over and over again."
The title of this memoir jumped right out at me. My memoir would have a very similar title but with Philly thrown in and probably a**hole. I mean, the title fits. It's also good to point out that I had no idea who Isaac was before picking this up. That is the power of having a title like this. It makes you want to see what this is all about.
Isaac tells his truths. No matter how heartbreaking, powerful, or cringy. He bares it all for the world without holding back. Even though parts are messy, he shows his love for others and the world through his captivating words. Those fears he conquered show throughout the entirety of this book and it makes you proud of who he was and who he came to be. Facing your fears can make you stronger and Isaac proves it.
Dirtbag, Massachusetts was a collection of essays that will make you live life to the fullest and not let your demons drag you under. Isaac is a brave soul to write about his past traumas and I applaud him for being so open and positive. This collection makes you look at your own life and makes you want to be a better human. It was a really great read.
The title of this memoir jumped right out at me. My memoir would have a very similar title but with Philly thrown in and probably a**hole. I mean, the title fits. It's also good to point out that I had no idea who Isaac was before picking this up. That is the power of having a title like this. It makes you want to see what this is all about.
Isaac tells his truths. No matter how heartbreaking, powerful, or cringy. He bares it all for the world without holding back. Even though parts are messy, he shows his love for others and the world through his captivating words. Those fears he conquered show throughout the entirety of this book and it makes you proud of who he was and who he came to be. Facing your fears can make you stronger and Isaac proves it.
Dirtbag, Massachusetts was a collection of essays that will make you live life to the fullest and not let your demons drag you under. Isaac is a brave soul to write about his past traumas and I applaud him for being so open and positive. This collection makes you look at your own life and makes you want to be a better human. It was a really great read.
May 29, 2022
I have this annoying thing I do when I read something that I love. I put it down before finishing it as sort of a pause to hold it over so that I can have more time with it because I don’t want it to end. I did that here as well except this time 3/4 of the way through I started over from the beginning and read it though once again before finally reaching the conclusion.
This memoir is everything a memoir should be — incredibly honest and absolutely insightful.
What I love most about Dirtbag, Massachusetts: A Confessional is that it offers the most valuable lesson in the fervent reminder that what made us isn’t all that we’re meant to be. We don’t forget and don’t not deal with our beginnings, and we hopefully take part in life as we allow it to further change and shape us. We don’t get so caught up that we become stuck because truly the only way through is forward.
Thanks to Isaac Fitzgerald for writing and sharing this personal collection of essays. Further thanks to NetGalley and Bloomsbury Publishing for allowing me a copy to read.
This memoir is everything a memoir should be — incredibly honest and absolutely insightful.
What I love most about Dirtbag, Massachusetts: A Confessional is that it offers the most valuable lesson in the fervent reminder that what made us isn’t all that we’re meant to be. We don’t forget and don’t not deal with our beginnings, and we hopefully take part in life as we allow it to further change and shape us. We don’t get so caught up that we become stuck because truly the only way through is forward.
Thanks to Isaac Fitzgerald for writing and sharing this personal collection of essays. Further thanks to NetGalley and Bloomsbury Publishing for allowing me a copy to read.
August 11, 2022
As a fellow Masshole, I was enjoying the early chapters of this essay/memoir as it spoke to some of the customs and idiosyncrasies that make your home state yours. But this quickly devolved into a shallow humblebrag leftist treatise that can be summed up thusly:
▪️Catholicism evil, Catholics hypocritical
▪️Porn good, sex workers nicest and most enlightened
▪️Whites should feel guilty and need to acknowledge they are universally privileged
▪️All bad actions stem from dysfunctional parents/upbringing/religion
I can’t imagine why I’d want to be lectured to by someone who mistakes virtue signaling for insight or drunken/drugged out war stories for prose.
▪️Catholicism evil, Catholics hypocritical
▪️Porn good, sex workers nicest and most enlightened
▪️Whites should feel guilty and need to acknowledge they are universally privileged
▪️All bad actions stem from dysfunctional parents/upbringing/religion
I can’t imagine why I’d want to be lectured to by someone who mistakes virtue signaling for insight or drunken/drugged out war stories for prose.
November 3, 2022
2.5*
Vaikiškų knygučių autoriaus dinamiški memuarai/esė. Tokia kelionė - nuo vaiko augusio Amerikos katalikų šeimoje ir patyrusio keistus kunigo komentarus išpažinties metu iki subrendusio vyro bandymų gelbėti pasaulį. Visai nebloga knyga, tiesiog - ne man. Labiau gal jauniems suaugėliams.
Va ši autoriaus foto man labai tiko šiai knygai.
Vaikiškų knygučių autoriaus dinamiški memuarai/esė. Tokia kelionė - nuo vaiko augusio Amerikos katalikų šeimoje ir patyrusio keistus kunigo komentarus išpažinties metu iki subrendusio vyro bandymų gelbėti pasaulį. Visai nebloga knyga, tiesiog - ne man. Labiau gal jauniems suaugėliams.
Va ši autoriaus foto man labai tiko šiai knygai.
October 18, 2022
My favorite I Think You Should Leave sketch is the one where Tim Robinson tries to hold a baby, and when the baby cries makes a giant show to everyone at a party about how he used to be a piece of shit. How was he a huge piece of shit? By eating sloppy steaks, slicking his hair back, eating wings, and drinking champagne on the beach with his buddies.
This book is a not-funny version of that sketch. Just some bored white dude recalling stories of how he used to be a piece of shit because when he was in his late 20s he was a bartender in San Francisco. But then (plot twist!), he never actually seems to be a piece of shit. It is not shocking to me that bartenders do drugs and have sex with people. And as long as the sex is consensual and he’s able to function without hurting people, what harm is being done? I guess his dirtbag-ness culminates in a blacked out motorcycle ride- which I don’t recommend obviously- but is also pretty vanilla as a narrative crux. (He also worked in porn, got paid to live in Burma, and got to climb Mount Kilimanjaro and I’m supposed to feel bad for him?)
Coming into this book, I was under the impression that it was going to be a sort of progressive version of Hillbilly Elegy, about a poor and violent white person who confronts his demons and privilege. Instead, at best, it reads like a catholic guilt confessional for fabricated sins and, at worst, it reeks of the white dude privilege that he’s attempting to confront. This dude wants to say that he used to be a piece of shit because that would cover for the fact that he’s simply a run-of-the-mill douchebag.
(I guess it’s similar to Hillbilly Elegy, in the fact that this book also sucks.)
I generally skip memoirs by straight white guys and I should have skipped this one, too. It was well reviewed by people whose opinions I’ve respected in the past, which is why it blows my mind how fucking stupid this book is.
Two stars because his writing is decent and you’re about 2/3 of the way in before you realize that it’s dumb and not going anywhere.
UPDATE: Downgraded the book to one star because in retrospect the writing is pretty bad. I often times confuse “easy to read” with “well written.” I should stop doing that.
This book is a not-funny version of that sketch. Just some bored white dude recalling stories of how he used to be a piece of shit because when he was in his late 20s he was a bartender in San Francisco. But then (plot twist!), he never actually seems to be a piece of shit. It is not shocking to me that bartenders do drugs and have sex with people. And as long as the sex is consensual and he’s able to function without hurting people, what harm is being done? I guess his dirtbag-ness culminates in a blacked out motorcycle ride- which I don’t recommend obviously- but is also pretty vanilla as a narrative crux. (He also worked in porn, got paid to live in Burma, and got to climb Mount Kilimanjaro and I’m supposed to feel bad for him?)
Coming into this book, I was under the impression that it was going to be a sort of progressive version of Hillbilly Elegy, about a poor and violent white person who confronts his demons and privilege. Instead, at best, it reads like a catholic guilt confessional for fabricated sins and, at worst, it reeks of the white dude privilege that he’s attempting to confront. This dude wants to say that he used to be a piece of shit because that would cover for the fact that he’s simply a run-of-the-mill douchebag.
(I guess it’s similar to Hillbilly Elegy, in the fact that this book also sucks.)
I generally skip memoirs by straight white guys and I should have skipped this one, too. It was well reviewed by people whose opinions I’ve respected in the past, which is why it blows my mind how fucking stupid this book is.
Two stars because his writing is decent and you’re about 2/3 of the way in before you realize that it’s dumb and not going anywhere.
UPDATE: Downgraded the book to one star because in retrospect the writing is pretty bad. I often times confuse “easy to read” with “well written.” I should stop doing that.
July 7, 2022
5 stars
Here, Fitzgerald creates a memoir through essays. While Fitzgerald's identities do not reflect those of authors (or characters) I typically read, I could not wait to get my hands on this very buzzy effort, and I am so glad I did.
Readers who have access to the audio version should absolutely grab it. Listening to Fitzgerald narrate his own experiences heightens the impact of what are (under any circumstances) profound and memorable moments and lessons. The throughline here is powerful, and Fitgerald bookends his work with his specific point of origin. Readers will have no questions about how far Fitzgerald has traveled - and yet how close he has stayed to his roots - upon completion.
I came into this book (despite LOVING, of all things, _How to Be a Pirate_) with some degree of skepticism about how relatable and impacting I'd find this narrative, but the storytelling is exceptional throughout. Fans of memoir will find this a fast, palatable, and surprisingly meaningful engagement.
*Special thanks to NetGalley and HighBridge for this audio arc, which I received in exchange for an honest review. The opinions expressed here are my own.
Here, Fitzgerald creates a memoir through essays. While Fitzgerald's identities do not reflect those of authors (or characters) I typically read, I could not wait to get my hands on this very buzzy effort, and I am so glad I did.
Readers who have access to the audio version should absolutely grab it. Listening to Fitzgerald narrate his own experiences heightens the impact of what are (under any circumstances) profound and memorable moments and lessons. The throughline here is powerful, and Fitgerald bookends his work with his specific point of origin. Readers will have no questions about how far Fitzgerald has traveled - and yet how close he has stayed to his roots - upon completion.
I came into this book (despite LOVING, of all things, _How to Be a Pirate_) with some degree of skepticism about how relatable and impacting I'd find this narrative, but the storytelling is exceptional throughout. Fans of memoir will find this a fast, palatable, and surprisingly meaningful engagement.
*Special thanks to NetGalley and HighBridge for this audio arc, which I received in exchange for an honest review. The opinions expressed here are my own.
January 13, 2023
This memoir-in-essays begins with childhood and ends with acceptance of who the author is and what has happened in his life. Fitzgerald grew up in the eighties and nineties, so he experienced that generation's version of sex, drugs, and rock and roll. He also reflects on his personal experience during the clergy scandal in the '60s, which is tough to read. The book is written as a series of essays that are not written in a linear way but that chronicle his life story. Some of it is presented out of sequence, hopping back and forth in time. One thing that strings it all together is his humor and honesty.
The author wrote openly about his body and his weight struggles. He even included a photo of, "Oh, wow, look at what I looked like then. I can't even believe it," which was lovely to see. I feel like we don't get enough of men talking about the struggles they have with their bodies, weight, and the idea of what it means to be a man. Usually it is a woman talking so it was a nice change.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://www.momsdonthavetimetoreadboo...
The author wrote openly about his body and his weight struggles. He even included a photo of, "Oh, wow, look at what I looked like then. I can't even believe it," which was lovely to see. I feel like we don't get enough of men talking about the struggles they have with their bodies, weight, and the idea of what it means to be a man. Usually it is a woman talking so it was a nice change.
To listen to my interview with the author, go to my podcast at:
https://www.momsdonthavetimetoreadboo...
February 6, 2023
Solid essay collection. Unique stories. You sense Fitzgerald is the kind of dude who doesn't hesitate to say 'yes' to something new, whether it be a job, trip, chance to learn, etc., so some of these stories are wild. Some essays are entertaining, some are more of an exploration of past trauma.
Full disclosure and no joke, I've followed Fitzgerald online partly for his romantic friendship with Saeed Jones (we would all be so lucky to have such a relationship), lolol, but I'm looking to see what he does next in his career, as he's young and seemingly has time to hone his literary voice.
Full disclosure and no joke, I've followed Fitzgerald online partly for his romantic friendship with Saeed Jones (we would all be so lucky to have such a relationship), lolol, but I'm looking to see what he does next in his career, as he's young and seemingly has time to hone his literary voice.
August 19, 2022
I generally and pretty diligently avoid memoir as a genre, and am sorry I didn’t in this case. I had to try this one since I’m a Massachusetts native who’s lived in the state most of my life, and for a number of years in the town next to the one where Fitzgerald grew up (during the time he was there). I did like reading descriptions of towns and places I’m familiar with.
Geographical connections aside, the book was pretty funny at first, starting with the opening sentence: “My parents were married when they had me, just to different people.” He talks about his own conception, which happened on a spiritual retreat while each of his Catholic parents (who met in divinity school) was cheating on his/her spouse. His parents are educated but penniless and spend time in South Boston working for a charitable organization helping out the poor. His mom moves with her son to north central Massachusetts when things start breaking down in her marriage.
With the start of his teenage years, Fitzgerald kind of devolves into a repetitive recitation of endless drinking, drugs, fights, and motorcycle rides which continue through private boarding school, college, and beyond. I got through 100 pages and then was so bored and uninterested I stopped. While I can’t legitimately claim this as a finished book, and I’m guessing he goes on to redeem himself somehow, I simply couldn’t waste any more time on it. I gave it two stars because the writing is pretty good.
Geographical connections aside, the book was pretty funny at first, starting with the opening sentence: “My parents were married when they had me, just to different people.” He talks about his own conception, which happened on a spiritual retreat while each of his Catholic parents (who met in divinity school) was cheating on his/her spouse. His parents are educated but penniless and spend time in South Boston working for a charitable organization helping out the poor. His mom moves with her son to north central Massachusetts when things start breaking down in her marriage.
With the start of his teenage years, Fitzgerald kind of devolves into a repetitive recitation of endless drinking, drugs, fights, and motorcycle rides which continue through private boarding school, college, and beyond. I got through 100 pages and then was so bored and uninterested I stopped. While I can’t legitimately claim this as a finished book, and I’m guessing he goes on to redeem himself somehow, I simply couldn’t waste any more time on it. I gave it two stars because the writing is pretty good.
February 12, 2023
Structured as a book of essays, Isaac Fitzgerald, writes in an authentic unique style. True to its subtitle, "a confessional", Fitzgerald documents episodes from his life, first as a young boy, born to parents who were both married to other people. This auspicious detail seems to color his development, often feeling as an outsider and different from others. Despite this his strength of character, intelligence, perseverance and self-reflection hold him in good stead as he attends good schools and follows his muse through various odd jobs, the most consistent one being a bartender.
I only stopped midway through because of a burning desire to get on with a waiting pile of books stacked high on my coffee table.
I recommend Dirtbag, Massachusetts to all who have an interest in personal essay/memoir; Fitzgeralds voice and style are unique, frankly honest and his escapades are varied, entertaining and touching.
I only stopped midway through because of a burning desire to get on with a waiting pile of books stacked high on my coffee table.
I recommend Dirtbag, Massachusetts to all who have an interest in personal essay/memoir; Fitzgeralds voice and style are unique, frankly honest and his escapades are varied, entertaining and touching.
April 22, 2022
Dirtbag Massachusetts is an unflinching memoir-in-essay that kinda rocked me, Mr. Fitzgerald. I’ve got more stuff to talk about in therapy this week than I was originally planning on, can I send you the bill?
Fitzgerald’s writing is vulnerable, tender-hearted, and full of charm; reading it felt equal parts familiar and revelatory. He recalls scenes from his life with the emotional clarity of the greatest storytellers, offering readers glimpses into his past, lessons learned, and the kind of persistent work it takes to become the best version of ourselves, jagged edges and all.
Reading Dirtbag Massachusetts is like watching a man turn the soil of his life, digging up the cold earth in preparation of a glorious, and colorful life.
Fitzgerald’s writing is vulnerable, tender-hearted, and full of charm; reading it felt equal parts familiar and revelatory. He recalls scenes from his life with the emotional clarity of the greatest storytellers, offering readers glimpses into his past, lessons learned, and the kind of persistent work it takes to become the best version of ourselves, jagged edges and all.
Reading Dirtbag Massachusetts is like watching a man turn the soil of his life, digging up the cold earth in preparation of a glorious, and colorful life.
August 5, 2022
“A Confessional” is an apt subtitle for this memoir-in-essays. I’ve followed Fitzgerald on Twitter for the past few years and subscribe to his Substack so I had a sense of who he was as a storyteller but I had no idea what this book would be like. He’s a compelling writer, making me want to lean in closer to hear more, as if we’re sitting across each other instead of me reading words on a page. He’s lived a rather unconventional life—he earned a boarding school scholarship, smuggled medical supplies in Burma, and his past jobs include bouncer, bartender, and porn actor—with a wide self-destructive streak, stemming from childhood poverty, physical and emotional abuse, and an unstable home. But there’s an affability to whatever he shares, in part because of his natural charm and in part because wants to know and be known. He’s been in therapy and is making sense of his old exploits and scars and what they mean to him now. Heed the content notes as needed because there is some difficult content. He shares about the ups and downs of his life and the lessons he’s learned (or still learning) and it made for good pondering. I particularly appreciated the way he grappled with his body dysmorphia and mental health. I would have never guessed this about him and that kind of honesty and openness will help so many people.
As much as I enjoyed this and found it to be strong work, something felt like it was missing and I haven’t quite pinned down what it is. I wanted more of a reckoning with some of the things he did in his past or to know what his relationship with anger is like these days. How and why did he have any contact with his abusive parents? (How could he be sure they really have changed? If anyone deserved to be cut off, it’s them.) It would have been helpful for him to delve more into how his present day drinking and drug use affects him and whether he sees any connection between that and his father’s alcoholism. Those choices contributed to poor decision-making in the past and I would have liked more reflection on that now. Perhaps it’s what he’s working through currently and it’s too soon to spill it on page. That’s fair. Books of this nature are a hard balance of vulnerability and self-awareness and not everything belongs to the public. Maybe it’s unfair for me to wish it had gone a little more in-depth. As it stands, this was well worth reading. I look forward to whatever he writes next.
Content notes: suicidal ideation, mother attempted suicide multiple times (hospitalized for a couple of weeks after one attempt), parental infidelity , violent home/domestic violence (not overly detailed), child physical and emotional abuse, mother told him she considered aborting him, father is recovering alcoholic and relapses, unstable housing (grew up in homeless shelter), sex work (porn), statutory rape/sexual abuse , pedophile priests and Catholic sexual abuse scandal , drove motorcycle while drunk (no accidents), minor injuries from motorcycle accident, fatshaming, fatphobia, weight loss and gain, body dysmorphia, Ritalin and Adderall abuse, author sold marijuana, racism (countered), various people who died (cancer, alcoholism, double murder, heart condition), fight club, BB guns, Burma civil war (includes mentions of child solders and landmines), childhood poverty, shoplifting, burglarizes homes, altitude sickness (sister), underage drinking, alcohol, excessing drinking, inebriation, recreational drug use (cocaine, mushrooms, speed, acid, etc.), marijuana, huffing, dip, cigarettes, gendered pejoratives, ableist language, mention of aunt with schizophrenia, mention of uncle accusing his father (author’s grandfather) of sexual abuse, references to sex, reference to kid who died by suicide, reference to getting mugged at age 8, reference to guy who sexually assaulted a girl who passed out at a party, references to homophobia and transphobia (countered), reference to AIDS epidemic, reference to sister-in-law’s miscarriage
As much as I enjoyed this and found it to be strong work, something felt like it was missing and I haven’t quite pinned down what it is. I wanted more of a reckoning with some of the things he did in his past or to know what his relationship with anger is like these days. How and why did he have any contact with his abusive parents? (How could he be sure they really have changed? If anyone deserved to be cut off, it’s them.) It would have been helpful for him to delve more into how his present day drinking and drug use affects him and whether he sees any connection between that and his father’s alcoholism. Those choices contributed to poor decision-making in the past and I would have liked more reflection on that now. Perhaps it’s what he’s working through currently and it’s too soon to spill it on page. That’s fair. Books of this nature are a hard balance of vulnerability and self-awareness and not everything belongs to the public. Maybe it’s unfair for me to wish it had gone a little more in-depth. As it stands, this was well worth reading. I look forward to whatever he writes next.
Content notes: suicidal ideation, mother attempted suicide multiple times (hospitalized for a couple of weeks after one attempt), parental infidelity , violent home/domestic violence (not overly detailed), child physical and emotional abuse, mother told him she considered aborting him, father is recovering alcoholic and relapses, unstable housing (grew up in homeless shelter), sex work (porn), statutory rape/sexual abuse , pedophile priests and Catholic sexual abuse scandal , drove motorcycle while drunk (no accidents), minor injuries from motorcycle accident, fatshaming, fatphobia, weight loss and gain, body dysmorphia, Ritalin and Adderall abuse, author sold marijuana, racism (countered), various people who died (cancer, alcoholism, double murder, heart condition), fight club, BB guns, Burma civil war (includes mentions of child solders and landmines), childhood poverty, shoplifting, burglarizes homes, altitude sickness (sister), underage drinking, alcohol, excessing drinking, inebriation, recreational drug use (cocaine, mushrooms, speed, acid, etc.), marijuana, huffing, dip, cigarettes, gendered pejoratives, ableist language, mention of aunt with schizophrenia, mention of uncle accusing his father (author’s grandfather) of sexual abuse, references to sex, reference to kid who died by suicide, reference to getting mugged at age 8, reference to guy who sexually assaulted a girl who passed out at a party, references to homophobia and transphobia (countered), reference to AIDS epidemic, reference to sister-in-law’s miscarriage
August 8, 2022
I came for the "dirtbag," but stayed for the "Massachusetts."
November 5, 2022
I’ve been sitting with this one for a while, and after seeing Fitzgerald speak recently in Nashville, it’s really grown on me. His audio narration is very in-your-face, think Guy Fieri. 😂 It really took some getting used to, but once you accept it, this memoir in essays depicting Fitzgerald’s life and experiences is very well done. It’s dark, smart, funny, and at times, incredibly sad. A solid read.
August 25, 2022
Sheesh!!! Wow! What a book.
February 13, 2024
3.5 stars, rounded up
I was drawn in by the hype paired with the Massachusetts setting (although most of the book was actually set in San Francisco lol). It was powerful and emotional in a lot of places, but the non-chronological collection-of-essays format made it feel somewhat disjointed, incomplete, and/or redundant in areas. Still, Fitzgerald is an effective writer, and I generally enjoy memoirs, so I do not regret reading it!
I was drawn in by the hype paired with the Massachusetts setting (although most of the book was actually set in San Francisco lol). It was powerful and emotional in a lot of places, but the non-chronological collection-of-essays format made it feel somewhat disjointed, incomplete, and/or redundant in areas. Still, Fitzgerald is an effective writer, and I generally enjoy memoirs, so I do not regret reading it!
July 13, 2022
Thank you, NetGalley, for this book!
I have known Isaac Fitzgerald for over a decade. I was a founding member of The Rumpus Book Club for several years. Isaac was the co-owner, managing editor, and moderator of our club’s message boards. He was like the fun uncle who had to get on to us every now and then to remind us to move our very off-topic conversations to our community threads rather than the book discussion threads. Through that book club, I made some excellent friends (hi, guys) who have kept in touch, and we read some books every now and then that are meaningful to our group: works by Adam Levin, Camille Bordas, and some upcoming ones by Elissa Bassist and Yuri Zalkow.
Although I got this book from NetGalley ages ago, I waited to read it until my friends could read, also. But, my mistake, I thought it was coming out this week, so I’m a week ahead. No matter. We will all get caught up soon enough. To read something by someone I’ve known for quite some time, although don’t really know at all, was a really interesting experience. I’ve heard Isaac’s voice a dozen times from his Today Show book suggestion segments. Side note: he always recommends excellent books. So, I could hear him coming through my kindle.
There are two types of memoirs. First: My life is so hard (it’s not) and I really need people to understand me (feel sorry for me) and my life of privilege really doesn’t matter (it does). Second: My life was hard (it was), but I take responsibility for my actions and admit, in the grand scheme of things, that I still had it pretty good compared to a lot of other people (because I am white). This book falls into the second category.
Isaac is an excellent writer, but he’s also very honest. This book pulls back the curtain on a lot of dark events of his life. Between having a trauma-filled childhood, never feeling comfortable in his skin, constantly searching for meaning and purpose, and wanting to do well in the world, Isaac lets the reader see what troubles him most. I loved this book. That’s odd to say because Isaac’s life was difficult, so I don’t want it to seem like I’m glad of that because it made for a good story. But I found Issac’s honesty and subsequent healing from all his trauma hopeful for his future. He seems to be in a much better place, which is what we all want for ourselves, no matter what our pasts reveal.
I have known Isaac Fitzgerald for over a decade. I was a founding member of The Rumpus Book Club for several years. Isaac was the co-owner, managing editor, and moderator of our club’s message boards. He was like the fun uncle who had to get on to us every now and then to remind us to move our very off-topic conversations to our community threads rather than the book discussion threads. Through that book club, I made some excellent friends (hi, guys) who have kept in touch, and we read some books every now and then that are meaningful to our group: works by Adam Levin, Camille Bordas, and some upcoming ones by Elissa Bassist and Yuri Zalkow.
Although I got this book from NetGalley ages ago, I waited to read it until my friends could read, also. But, my mistake, I thought it was coming out this week, so I’m a week ahead. No matter. We will all get caught up soon enough. To read something by someone I’ve known for quite some time, although don’t really know at all, was a really interesting experience. I’ve heard Isaac’s voice a dozen times from his Today Show book suggestion segments. Side note: he always recommends excellent books. So, I could hear him coming through my kindle.
There are two types of memoirs. First: My life is so hard (it’s not) and I really need people to understand me (feel sorry for me) and my life of privilege really doesn’t matter (it does). Second: My life was hard (it was), but I take responsibility for my actions and admit, in the grand scheme of things, that I still had it pretty good compared to a lot of other people (because I am white). This book falls into the second category.
Isaac is an excellent writer, but he’s also very honest. This book pulls back the curtain on a lot of dark events of his life. Between having a trauma-filled childhood, never feeling comfortable in his skin, constantly searching for meaning and purpose, and wanting to do well in the world, Isaac lets the reader see what troubles him most. I loved this book. That’s odd to say because Isaac’s life was difficult, so I don’t want it to seem like I’m glad of that because it made for a good story. But I found Issac’s honesty and subsequent healing from all his trauma hopeful for his future. He seems to be in a much better place, which is what we all want for ourselves, no matter what our pasts reveal.
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