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Joyce F. Benenson
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Warriors and Worriers MP3 CD – MP3 Audio, June 14, 2016

4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 51 ratings
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The question of exactly what sex differences exist and whether they have a biological foundation has been one of our culture's favorite enduring discussions. It should. After a baby is born, a parent's first concern is for its physical health. The next concern is its sex. Only in the most modern societies does sex not virtually guarantee the type of future life a new human being will have. Even in modern societies, one's sex usually plays a large role in the path a life follows.

Scientists have published thousands of papers on the subject, with the general conclusion being that men and women are mostly the same, whatever differences exist have been socialized, and what differences exist have to do with women bearing children and men being physically stronger.

In Warriors and Worriers, psychologist Joyce Benenson presents a new theory of sex differences, based on thirty years of research with young children and primates around the world. Her innovative theory focuses on how men and women stay alive. Benenson draws on a fascinating array of studies and stories that explore the ways boys and men deter their enemies, while girls and women find assistants to aid them in coping with vulnerable children and elders. This produces two social worlds for each sex which sets humans apart from most other primate species. Human males form cooperative groups that compete against out-groups, while human females exclude other females in their quest to find mates, female family members to invest in their children, and keep their own hearts ticking. In the process, Benenson turns upside down the familiar wisdom that women are more sociable than men and that men are more competitive than women.

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  1. Language
    English
  2. Publisher
    Audible Studios on Brilliance Audio
  3. Publication date
    June 14, 2016
  4. Dimensions
    6.5 x 0.63 x 5.5 inches
  5. ISBN-10
    1522694005
  6. ISBN-13
    978-1522694007
  7. See all details
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Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Audible Studios on Brilliance Audio; Unabridged edition (June 14, 2016)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1522694005
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1522694007
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 3.5 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6.5 x 0.63 x 5.5 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.7 4.7 out of 5 stars 51 ratings

About the author

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Joyce F. Benenson

Joyce F. Benenson

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Joyce Benenson is a lecturer in the Department of Human Evolutionary Biology department at Harvard University. She has studied children's interactions since she was 19 as an undergraduate at Duke University. After obtaining her Ph.D. from Harvard University in 1988, she was a post-doc at Radcliffe College, an assistant professor at the University of Hartford in Psychology, an assistant/associate professor at McGill University in Montreal in Canada in Educational Psychology, a reader in Ethology at the University of Plymouth in England in Experimental Psychology, and a full professor of Psychology at Emmanuel College in Boston before her current position.

Customer reviews

4.7 out of 5 stars
4.7 out of 5
51 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

D K
5.0 out of 5 stars Required reading
Reviewed in the United States on August 20, 2022
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Required reading for anyone who wants to understand themselves, and our species from a scientific view point. Just as Stanley Milgram's obedience experiments, are not popular reading, Benenson's documented data, and explanation as to the cause of human's behavior is not flattering. Thus it has been ignored when it should be considered essential knowledge, for anyone wishing to consider themselves educated.
Do yourself a favor, buy it, read it, and understand our world more clearly.
9 people found this helpful
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A.H.
5.0 out of 5 stars It's a feeling of dislike, that women act on without realizing its origins
Reviewed in the United States on December 12, 2016
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For evolutionary reasons and millennia of polygamy, women are set up to undermine women who appear to be more competent than they. It's not a conscious decision. It's a feeling of dislike, that women act on without realizing its origins.

The effect it has had on women is terrible. Since women now have access to good jobs, they find there other 'competitors' and engage in epic battles that are totally pointless and make everyone look bad. Invariably, male managers step in to stop women from fighting. Many (most) women cannot effectively mentor each other and will not nurture female talent. The consequences became more obvious after Hillary lost the election.

The author tells some terribly inconvenient truths. This book should have been on a best seller list, but female authors typically get ignored.
7 people found this helpful
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Dave S
4.0 out of 5 stars Sexual Differences
Reviewed in the United States on September 4, 2014
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These are interesting ideas neatly presented by a highly qualified author. They are especially interesting when viewed against the backdrop of David Geary's comphehensive theory of sexual differences presented in his book "Male, Female".
3 people found this helpful
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jingoBC
5.0 out of 5 stars You Cannot Just Buy “What to Expect When Expecting”
Reviewed in the United States on May 30, 2018
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This book should be bought in addition to “What to Expect When Expecting.” While the aforementioned book details the experience of gestation, this book is about what comes after. A science-based cross-cultural, cross-species view of sex differences that is extremely engaging. Dr. Benenson’s easy to read book is a must. I find myself talking about often. As I read it I observed and applied the knowledge in the book to my children’s behavior. The accuracy of the author’s work was jaw dropping. I’m very happy I discovered this book.
4 people found this helpful
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Fairooz Adams
5.0 out of 5 stars Fascinating read
Reviewed in the United States on January 26, 2020
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It had always puzzled me why women and girls run through best friends like toilet paper, this makes a lot of sense of just how unique men’s and women’s social dynamics are. Also explains my hobbies as interests when I was a boy. I thought my childhood obsession with big explosions and throwing rocks made me odd. Turns out that’s normal.
3 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Men and Women are Innately Different
Reviewed in the United States on September 22, 2016
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Clearly written and debunks the myth that men and women are the same. They are innately different and this should demolish the politically correct position that all professions and lifestyle choices should have equal representation of the sexes. Innately most men and women like different things. That doesn't preclude individual men and women choosing from the entire gamut of professions and lifestyle choices but it does mean that more girls are going to choose to care for their families and men to volunteer for the military. A great read/listen.
8 people found this helpful
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Ryan Bohnenkamp
5.0 out of 5 stars Rock solid foundational evolutionary gender psychology
Reviewed in the United States on April 17, 2015
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This book is flawlessly documented and extremely difficult to argue with. The author's focus on the behaviors of children across cultures is very convincing with regard to selling her points as inborn traits. My biggest complaints are with the book's tone--the title alone is worth a thousand facepalms. It's a brilliant literature review on a topic seldom covered with this level of candor. I highly recommend it.
8 people found this helpful
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G. robin
5.0 out of 5 stars Easy to read and entertaining as well
Reviewed in the United States on April 19, 2016
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Incredible and eye opening book. Very helpful in understanding myself and with relationships with men and women in my daily life.
Brave author to debunk lots of modern misconceptions on gender. Easy to read and entertaining as well. Scientifically proves wrong the 2016 notion that the only differences between men and women are physical attributes.
2 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

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Ulrik Rasmussen
5.0 out of 5 stars An eye-opening book
Reviewed in Germany on July 10, 2023
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Very well written. Sound constructed arguments with good documentation.
Surprising how much war there is in worrying.
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Utilisateur Lambda
5.0 out of 5 stars Brillant !
Reviewed in France on March 28, 2019
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Brillant et richement référencé, le meilleur livre sur Homo Sapiens que j'ai jamais lu. Une vraie bouffée d'air frais dans l'atmosphère étouffante du politiquement correct.
One person found this helpful
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Belinda Brown
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 1, 2017
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great
2 people found this helpful
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A. Volk
4.0 out of 5 stars Intriguing look at men (boys) versus women (girls), but needs more evidence
Reviewed in Canada on March 6, 2014
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Beneson is not the first person to look at the differences between the sexes, even from an evolutionary perspective (e.g.,  Male, Female: The Evolution of Human Sex Differences 2nd (second) Edition by Geary, David C. published by Amer Psychological Assn (2009) . However, she takes a relatively new tack on the subject by linking male and female traits to two distinct sex roles. Males are warriors, females as worrying mothers.

From an evolutionary perspective, this is not an unreasonable approach. There is good data suggesting that these are indeed to highly sex-linked roles that were important for ancestral humans. Beneson draws initially upon developmental research looking at the behavior of young children to build her case. Much of it her work. Her argument is that if we are indeed predisposed to behave in certain ways, then we should see these behavioral differences in the sexes emerge early, without any strong environmental inputs. She does present some compelling data to suggest that boys are indeed somewhat predisposed to seek out other boys, form competitive groups that compete with each other, but put internal differences aside in the face of competing with external groups. Girls on the other hand tend to have a much more individualistic approach, maintaining relationships with a smaller number of peers for shorter periods of time. Indeed, this represents one of her more interesting findings. Counter-intuitively, boys are MORE social than girls, and are BETTER at retaining friendships. Largely because boys seem to be able to overlook and/or forgive small slights to friendships because of the need to maintain a cohesive front against external groups. Given that a cohesive group is essential to fighting off enemies, this is a valuable trait for boys to have. Fight within a group for dominance, but set all issues aside (and maintain friendships) when enemies arise. And boys seem to be very concerned about enemies or villains from a very young age. They like setting up mock-fights with opponents as well as real fights.

Girls generally do not. They prefer more nurturing activities as well as less risky activities than boys. Because a woman's primary role is raising her children, and her welfare is extremely important for the success of that job. No one else cares for a child (in most cases) as well as their birth mother. This means girls don't need to build huge coalitions. Indeed, other girls can be competitors for resources a woman eventually needs to raise her own children. So girls make and break friendships more often. They exclude other girls more often than boys exclude boys. Yet they fight less because they have more to lose than boys/men do (the latter can sacrifice their life to save their wife and child, knowing that their wife will likely do a good job raising the child).

I can't do full justice to the hypothesis here, but it's an interesting and compelling one that I largely agree with. However, I don't think it's the entire story. Or that the data is as cut and dry as Beneson would have us believe. She uses a lot of anecdotal evidence as well as a lot of leaps from children to adults (and vice versa) to support her story. She also ignores some potentially revealing evidence, such as personality trait differences. Personality traits would be a simple and efficient mechanism to result in the behaviors she explains without having to rely on specialized behavioral modules tuned to different social behaviors.

Overall then, I found it a very compelling read. Beneson's hypothesis certainly is in line with a significant quantity of evidence. Her logic is generally sound, although it could be tighter in spots. Her writing is clear and engaging, making the book easy to read (I'd say it's aimed at a general, if educated, audience). However, I can't quite give the book five stars because a lot of it is still based on conjecture and weak data that is often presented too strongly for my tastes. So good book, better idea, and I'm looking forward to seeing more data to test and/or flesh out the basic hypothesis.
One person found this helpful
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